The Stars, bad jokes, f-bombs and jew homies were out in full force at last nights Oscars. James Franco and Anne Hathaway did their best to make it a very forgettable evening but I found a few gems tucked deep in Mila Kunis's tight-little-boobie-dress...... REDEMPTION!!
This is some world class HATE CRIME right here. I haven't heard HATE this good since I dropped that Gary Coleman joke 5 minutes after the little homie's wife killed him. Sad part about it is, if you just look at this dude it is painfully obvious that his penis ranks right up there with the Coachella Wizard.
[TMZ] According to the police report, Elycia says, Frankie "punched her in the back of the head, and threw her into a wall while in the downstairs bedroom."
TMZ obtained a police report filed in Phoenix, AZ last Friday. According to the report, Muniz and his girlfriend, Elycia Turnbow, were arguing in their home about "prior relationships." Elycia told cops, Frankie "grabbed a gun and held it to his head, possibly with the intent of committing suicide."
If my memory serves me correctly (which I strongly doubt), this dork quit acting to race cars right? Then he moves his hot girlfriend to Arizona?! This dude should be happy that she didn't KILL HERSELF a long time ago.... who the fuck lives in Arizona? I will give it to this little guy though, never punch your girl in the front of the head, that is just NO BUENO!!
Irina Shayk (whoever that is) is this years recipient of the S.I. Swimsuit Edition cover. Irina can now bask in the fantastic realization that truckers, Fed-Ex/UPS drivers, and pre/post pubescent teenage boys will give up their free online porn addiction for the next few days to purchase what equates to "jack-off" material.
If they were smart they would wait a few days until the images are all online. That way they can make a powerpoint slideshow presentation using their favorite pics, which would make for a way more convenient 'hands-free' experience.
JUST SAYIN'
UPDATE: Jergens lotion stock has risen by 47% in the last 24 hours..... curious.
Veteran CBS Los Angeles reporter Serene Branson, live from outside the Grammy venue, popped up appearing to speak gibberish. Reports flooded Twitter that she was drunk or that she simply got tongue-tied owing to a delay in her earpiece; READ MORE
-----------------------------
What the fuck was that?
I haven't seen a bomb that bad since I 'King's Speeched' a Boys and Girls club award ceremony back in the day. I was drunk and nervous but at least I sounded like a idiot in English, LORD HAVE MERCY. This shit is straight gobbledygook!!!
This year I vowed to be a kinder and gentler me. More subdued and less impulsive, more thoughtful and less hateful, more willing to look at a person and refrain from passing judgement.
I tried......but thanks to these two idiots, the beast that burns deep within my soul has risen once more. To seek vengeance upon those who still think it's ok to wear cowboy boots and leggings....ever!!
note: ...and good job U.S. Weekly. You can go back to stuffing Kim Kardashqvxzpjddadian down our fucking throats now... Thanks ;)
